G is for Gentleness-Philippians 4:5

New Testament, Philippians, Sermons

Philippians 4:5

“Let your gentleness be evident to all” (Phil 4:5, NIV). “Let your reasonableness be known to everyone” (Phil 4:5, ESV). “Let your gentle spirit be known to all men” (Phil 4:5, NASB). “Let your graciousness be known to everyone” (Phil 4:5, HCSB). “Let everyone see that you are considerate in all you do” (Phil 4:5, NLT).

Theme: It takes real inner strength for one to be gentle toward others. A weak person will not have the inner resources to be gentle—for true gentleness requires power that is under control. A person who is not gentle is therefore a weak person.

Preamble: Tough or gentle? We human beings love tough and victorious people, don’t we? We like Rambo who can blow away all his enemies with impunity. We like superheroes–Superman, Batman, Spiderman, Iron Man, Captain America–who can defeat any and all powerful enemies. We like fearless movie characters like Jason Bourne (Matt Damon), Ethan Hunt (Tom Cruise) and my favorite Dirty Harry (Clint Eastwood) who, against all odds, can never ever be defeated by anyone, no matter how powerful.

As Christians don’t we like “fighter verses”? Fight the good fight (2 Tim 4:7), be faithful unto death (Rev 2:10), take heart, I have overcome (conquered) the world (Jn 16:33), finish the race and complete your task (Ac 20:24), make disciples (Mt 28:19, preach the gospel (Mk 16:15), take up your cross (Mt 16:24; Mk 8:34; Lk 9:23), give them something to eat (Mt 14:16; Mk 6:37; Lk 9:13). To the seven churches, Christ promises victory and great reward to all those who overcome (Rev 2:7, 11, 17, 26; 3:5, 12, 21). For Christ, we want to conquer the world with the gospel. But do we like verses that might come across as weak or gentle?

Be meek, be humble, be kind, be gracious, be gentle. We might think, even if subconsciouly, that if we reveal our weaknesses or vulnerabilities to others by being gracious or gentle, they could take advantage of us. But the Bible has countless verses that encourages God’s people and Christians to be gentle, just as God is gracious and gentle toward us, even while we sin.

Scary Bible verses. I have several verses that I regard as scary. Num 32:23: “…you may be sure that your sin will find you out.” Exo 20:5 (1984 NIV): “…punishing the children for the sin of the fathers to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me.” The 2011 translation is somewhat of a relief: “punishing the children for the sin of the parents.” But when I checked the original Hebrew word, it is “father” (father of an individual) and not “parents.” Sigh. A verse that has always caused me to cringe is Phil 4:5, our key verse for today: “Let your gentleness be evident to ALL.” This verse scares me because I know that my natural disposition is anything but gentle. I am more like Dirty Harry (Go ahead. Make my day.) than like Jesus, the most gentle person ever (Mt 11:29).

Live out the gospel in life and community. In our sermon series Practical Christian Living–the ABCs over the last few months, our prayer is to live out the gospel in our lives through the themes covered: A is for Accountability, B is for Beauty, C is for Community, D is for Delight, E is for Experience, F is for Father, F is for Freedom, F is for Friendship, and F is for Forgetfulness. Each of these key words, properly understood and lived out, would enable us to live a life pleasing to God as well as a blessing to others. Today we consider G is for Gentleness:

  1. What the Bible says about gentleness.
  2. The prudence and wisdom of gentleness.
  1. What the Bible says about Gentleness

Are Christians gentle? Attributes of Christ include gentleness, humility, meekness, mildness, kindness, consideration, etc. These attributes are attractive to all people. Yet when we think of Christians these attributes may not stand out prominently as being descriptive of some of us. Might we not sometimes think of Christians as being rude, judgmental, critical, harsh, ungracious, sanctimonious, condescending, arrogant, etc.? It is evident that gentleness is not common in the world, and sometimes does not even seem common in the church and among Christians either.

Among the least practiced virtues by Christians. In Systematic Theology: An Introduction to Christian Belief, John Frame writes, “My perception is that gentleness and humility are among the virtues least practiced by Christians today. If God himself can serve his creatures, surely we, who can boast of nothing except the cross, should be able to serve without seeking constantly to maintain or improve our own status and reputation.” (pg. 253)

Divisions, church splits and suboptimal relationships happen as a result of a lack of gentleness. When one is gentle toward others, we can disagree without being disagreeable and we can argue without anger and aggressiveness. When one is gentle with others, relationships and friendships can be maintained and do not sour as easily. For a marriage to be happy and healthy, spouses need to be gentle and submissive toward each other (Eph 5:21). But if one communicates harshly, rudely, accusingly or condescendingly toward others, it breaks the bond of unity, friendship, trust and love. Not being gentle with others might be the surest way to cause a church to appear unchristlike and unloving to the world.

Christians should be gentle. The word “ἐπιεικής” (epieikēs) means gentle, mild, forbearing, fair, reasonable, moderate, equitable, yielding. In various English Bibles it is translated as “gentleness” (NIV), “reasonableness” (ESV), “gentle spirit” (NASB), “graciousness” (HCSB) and “considerate” (NLT). This word is used five times in five verses in the NT (1 Tim 3:3; Tit 3:2; Jas 3:17; 1 Pet 2:18). In context:

  • Christian leaders should be gentle. An overseer or elder or pastor should not be violent but gentle (1 Tim 3:3): “…not addicted to wine, not a bully but gentle, not quarrelsome, not greedy” (1 Tim 3:3, HCSB).
  • Christians should be gentle. The people of God should slander no one, be peaceable and considerate (Tit 3:2): “They must not slander anyone and must avoid quarreling. Instead, they should be gentle and show true humility to everyone” (Tit 3:2, NLT). Paul instructs Titus to encourage Christians “to show perfect courtesy toward all people” (Tit 3:2, ESV), “to be gentle toward everyone” (Tit 3:2, NIV), to show “every consideration for all men” (Tit 3:2, NASB), and to “show true humility to everyone” (Tit 3:2, NLT).
  • Wisdom from God is gentle. The wisdom that comes from heaven is pure, peace-loving, considerate (Jas 3:17): “But the wisdom from above is first of all pure. It is also peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others. It is full of mercy and the fruit of good deeds. It shows no favoritism and is always sincere” (Jas 3:17, NLT).
  • Jesus is gentle. Jesus says about himself, “I am gentle (πρᾶος) and humble (ταπεινός) (or lowly) in heart” (Mt 11:29), or “I am humble and gentle at heart” (Mt 11:29, NLT).

Gentleness is not weakness but great strength. A closely related word “πραότης” (praotēs) means mildness, gentleness, meekness, kindness. It also means properly, temperate, displaying the right blend of force and reserve (gentleness). It is “strength in gentleness.” It avoids unnecessary harshness, yet without compromising or being too slow to use necessary force. This word is used nine times in the NT. Some verses are:

  • Paul’s appeal is gentle. In the face of self-boasting and self-commending church leaders (2 Cor 10:12), Paul appeals to the Corinthians by the meekness and gentleness of Christ (2 Cor 10:1): “Now I, Paul, appeal to you with the gentleness and kindness of Christ—though I realize you think I am timid in person and bold only when I write from far away” (2 Cor 10:1, NLT).
  • The fruit of the Spirit is gentle (Gal 5:23): “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control” (Gal 5:22-23). In the KJV “kindness” and “gentleness” are reversed (Gal 5:22-23, KJV).
  • Restoring others who sin should be done gently. Paul encourages Christians in Galatia who are spiritual to restore those caught in a sin gently (Gal 6:1): “Dear brothers and sisters, if another believer is overcome by some sin, you who are godly should gently and humbly help that person back onto the right path. And be careful not to fall into the same temptation yourself” (Gal 6:1, NLT).
  • Christians must always be humble and gentle. Paul encourages the Christians in Ephesus to be completely humble and gentle (Eph 4:2): “Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love” (Eph 4:2, NLT).
  • Christians must always be clothed with gentleness. Paul states that God’s chosen people are to clothe themselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness (Col 3:12): “Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience” (Col 3:12, NLT).
  • Paul encourages Timothy to pursue gentleness (1 Tim 6:11): “But you, man of God, run from these things, and pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, endurance, and gentleness” (1 Tim 6:11, HCSB).
  • Paul says to gently instruct those who oppose you (2 Tim 2:25): “…correcting his opponents with gentleness. God may perhaps grant them repentance leading to a knowledge of the truth” (2 Tim 2:25, ESV).
  • Honor Christ before others gently. “Instead, you must worship Christ as Lord of your life. And if someone asks about your hope as a believer, always be ready to explain it. But do this in a gentle (πραΰτης) and respectful way” (1 Pet 3:15-16, NLT).

Gentleness in the OT. God’s gentleness, meekness or humility is mentioned in 2 Sam 22:36 and Ps 18:35. This virtue is commended in human beings in the OT (Num 12:3; Ps 22:26; Ps 25:9, HCSB), though not as often or as prominently as in the NT as noted in the multiple references above. To refer to God as meek or gentle might be a bit surprising since God is the Almighty King, Lord and Sovereign Ruler over all creation.

God expresses his power through gentle servantship. Quite unlike typical human leaders, Jesus teaches the nature of leadership in his kingdom as not being served, but serving (Mt 20:28; Mk 10:45; Lk 22:26; Jn 13:13-15). Without a doubt, the love of Christ is the standard of the Christian life. Such love necessarily involves gentleness and humility, a self-abasement that does not destroy us but fulfills what God meant us to be. Surely, Jesus’ self-abasement reveals something about the very lordship of God. For all his mighty power, he is a Lord who serves his people (Lk 12:37). Such divine service does not compromise his power or authority. Rather, it is the form that his power takes.

  1. The Prudence and Wisdom of Gentleness

Quotes:

  • “I choose gentleness… Nothing is won by force. I choose to be gentle. If I raise my voice may it be only in praise. If I clench my fist may it only be in prayer. If I make a demand may it only be of myself.” Max Lucado.
  • “For a cup brimful of sweet water cannot spill even one drop of bitter water, however suddenly jolted.” Amy Carmichael.
  • “Only the weak are cruel. Gentleness can only be expected from the strong.” Leo Buscaglia.
  • “There is nothing stronger in the world than gentleness.” Han Suyin.
  • “Our greatest strength lies in the gentleness and tenderness of our heart.” Rumi.
  • “Nothing is so strong as true gentleness. Nothing is so gentle as true strength.” Johann Wolfgang von Goethe.
  • “With gentleness overcome anger. With generosity overcome meanness. With truth overcome deceit.” Buddha.
  • “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness” (2 Cor 12:9, NLT).
  • “…a gentle tongue can break a bone” (Prov 25:15). “…soft speech can break bones” (Prov 25:15, NLT).

How does one become gentle? No one can make themselves gentle. We become gentle only when we know that there is One who is gentle with us. Because of our sins, we should be treated harshly, ruthlessly, even mercilessly as our sins deserve, which is very fair and just. Instead, God “does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities” (Ps 103:10). This is nothing but the pure grace of God. Instead, there is One who would be dealt with harsly, though he was sinless. In the agony and anguish of his innocent soul, he could not but cry out the most profound words ever uttered, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me” (Mt 27:46; Mk 15:34; Ps 22:1). God forsook him, so that He would not forsake us. God was harsh with himself and with his Son, so that he can be endlessly gentle with us.

Knowing this, remembering this, and reflecting on such tenderness and gentleness extended toward us, can we then be gentle with others?

Practical Application:

  1. Gentleness works (Prov 25:15)! Being rough, rude, bossy, pushy, intimidating, coercive and tough works against you.
  2. Gentleness is not weakness. You need inner strength to be gentle (2 Cor 12:9).
  3. You cannot make yourself gentle. It is the fruit of the Spirit (Gal 5:22-23).
  4. The more you live and walk and are led by the Spirit of God (Gal 5:16, 18), the more God transforms you to be gentle (Gal 5:22-23).
  5. The gentler you are, the more powerful and influential you become.
  6. Jesus is the most gentle person (Mt 11:29), and the most powerful conqueror. He is both a lion and a lamb (Rev 5:5-6).

Sermon outline: What the Bible says about gentleness.

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